Traumatized by Tangled Hair: How to Heal Childhood Hair Trauma and Reparent Yourself | #155

Did you grow up as a latch key kid with tangled hair and a caregiver who made it worse — not better? You're not alone. In Daily Dose of Dawn #155, Dawn explores the surprising reality of childhood hair trauma, how early experiences of pain and shame around something as simple as brushing your hair can quietly chip away at your self-worth for decades. She shares her own story, what reparenting yourself actually looks like in practice, and why buying the good detangler is about so much more than your hair.

Watch the Video Here or Read the Script below

Who knew hair trauma was a thing?

This incredibly specific Dose is for someone who had unkempt hair when they were little and the people who took care of them were not gentle about it. I know it's random and it will probably only apply to like one other person.

You were a latch key kid with long hair that tangled easily. And for some reason, you were left to take care of your hair by yourself from a young age.

When your caregiver would get involved, there would be lots of verbal complaints about your hair — "rats nest" — and how it's your fault. "How do you always make such a mess of this?" And plenty of yanking to round off the torture.

If you identify with all of that, welcome in to your Daily Dose of Dawn — videos designed to expand your thinking.

So, why think about this?

Well, I'm 55 years old now, and this all came flooding back into my awareness as I was blow drying my adult son's hair this morning. It's similar to mine — baby fine, but there's a lot of it, so it tangles easily.

It didn't feel good to think about it.

I minimized a lot of my pain from my childhood. It helped me with the resilience. If I told myself it wasn't that bad, it was easier to get over. But you know what? It was bad.

Not that my mom was bad. She was just an underloved lady who never got what she needed. So she never knew how to give anyone else what they needed. But living like that takes a toll on you. And it fed into me not liking myself for the first 35 years I was alive.

No blame, just understanding, calling it out. It wasn't fair. It wasn't cool. But it's also over now.

I've talked a lot about what I call moming yourself — the docs call it reparenting. So what does that look like in real life?

For me, when it came to my hair, it looked like:

A special detangler that I use before I ever even think about brushing

A special hair brush — the style of which is actually called Pink Dawn — specifically a detangling brush for fine hair

A great shampoo and conditioner

A loving touch

I also defend my hat-wearing obsession, as it's actually a protection for my neurospicy head.

I thought about that because it's warmer now in LA, so I was using a hair tie instead of my little beanie. After a few minutes, I started to feel stressed — I realized my hair was being pulled by the hair tie.

I love to wear the beanie because it's so much more coverage than a headband. I can tuck the little hairs in that tickle my face or poke me in the eye while I'm driving. I have spatial issues and it kind of acts like a soft bumper to keep me from banging my head on things. And if I randomly need a narcolepsy nap, I can pull it down and have a nice little blocker.

The bottom line is: if you were mistreated when you were younger, that sucks. Straight up. It really does.

But you're not younger anymore — so you can make it up to yourself now.

Buy the detangler. Get the good brush. Love yourself and your hair with everything you've got. Take back your power, and help others do the same.

Together, we all win.

Dawn's Lead with Love Hair Care Recommendations:

As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. This means if you purchase through these links, I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you.

🌿 Pacifica Coconut Detangler Spray: https://amzn.to/4lJQMX3

💜 Tangle Teezer fine hair Brush (Mint Violet): https://amzn.to/4uSe7u4

✨ Shikai Color Reflect Shampoo (3-pack): https://amzn.to/3NpvO3f

💛 Shikai Moisture Colored Hair Repair Conditioner (3-pack): https://amzn.to/4bKCVvc

🌟 Naturtint (plant based) Light Dawn Blonde Color (yes, it's called "Dawn"!): https://amzn.to/4d6omV0