Dose 19 Friendship
“I love the people in my life that I know I'm solid with. We run into each other like soldiers on the battlefield of life. Back to back, swords in hand, we reconnect. I'm ok. You're ok? We're ok? Ok good. Back into the melee we go.” - Dawn Super
Tell me who you walk with and I’ll tell you who you are.
Daily Dose of Dawn at dawn # 19
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Be with people who reflect the best in you and also aren’t afraid to call you out on your BS.
I was on the phone with my friend and she said, “I hate that you talk over me,”
“Thank you for telling me that,” was the first thing I said – because I know how hard it can be to be honest with people.
I won’t lie; my first trauma-based instinct was to defend myself – but there really is no defense for talking over people. It’s rude.
From that conversation, I discovered that I am a dual-processor – meaning I can do two things at once. Like, I can sing a song while typing an email that has nothing to do with what I’m singing…
I didn’t know everyone wasn’t built like that. Some people, when they get interrupted, completely forget where they were at – not sometimes, but every time.
Understanding this helped me be a better friend. As someone who grew up with crappy social skills, I had to learn how to “Be someone I’d want to hang around with.”
The biggest reason why I appreciated this is because it showed me that my friend really wanted to stay friends with me.
If she didn’t, she would have just said ‘oh, I don’t like that gal, she interrupts me.’ And she would have just stopped interacting with me. I know this because that’s what happened to me in the past.
This is another reason why I make this content. My life used to be a dumpster fire rolling down a hill. Through a lot of paying attention, noticing, identifying different strategies, and practicing them, I became a different person.
You don’t have to let the way trauma raised you be the way you continue your days.
So, thank you Lynne, for being brave enough all those years ago to call me out. It made me a better person and a better friend. I admire your character and I love walking through this world with you for a friend.
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